Hi there,

I’d like to share this true story with you, sorry it’s a little long but I’m sure you’ll enjoy it!

When I was living in the South of China my wife and I decided to go on holiday to a local beauty spot, but the actual experience was a little more than I bargained for…

My wife is a very beautiful Chin*ese lady, but as much as I love Lily there is a side to her character that, as a westerner, is very difficult for me to adjust to, and does cause a few arguments now and then.

You see, embedded deep into her phsyche is the notion that she has to save the smallest amount of money at every opportunity. You only have to visit any market or shop and witness the frenetic bargaining that takes place just to save a few cents to see what I mean.

This is an admirable trait, I mean who doesn’t want to save money? But…

Sometimes I think Lily takes it a little too far.

However, back to our holiday…

We decided to travel to a local beauty spot, about three hours away, one recent weekend. The place is called De Tian (pronounced Der T N) waterfall and is situated on the Chinese/Vietnamese border.

It is a very beautiful waterfall but when Lily made enquiries about the price she was aghast. “What Y80 per person just to go in and see a waterfall?” she nearly shouted down the phone!

In dollar terms Y80 is about $10 – not that much you may think – but in local terms it’s a lot. For example you can buy 50kg of fresh vegetables for that price, that’s right 50kg!

Well I can tell you it didn’t take her long to start scheming and she was soon on the Internet making up a money saving plan!

As all the arrangements were done in the local dialects which I do not understand I wasn’t fully aware what I was letting myself in for.

Anyway, off we trundled, by bus and three wheel trike (public transport is wonderfully fast, reliable and cheap here) duly arriving at the waterfall site in about three hours.

The last leg of the journey was by trike and along the way we’d picked up a passenger whom I thought was a friend of the driver coming along for the ride as sometimes happens…

But no, this was our guide as I found out when we stopped in the middle of nowhere and Lily said it’s time to get off.

Our guide duly disappeared into the nearest clump of bushes and was off like a scolded cat with hardly a word. Lily too shot off after him and called for me to follow.

A little confused about the sudden turn of events I obediantly followed and was soon scrambling through ankle deep mud trying to find a path through the jungle on the river banks.

My friend imagine for a second that you have to half run along slippy, growth entangled river banks that angle down towards the river at about 60 degrees, with a carry bag in your hands containing all your kit for a nice weekend away. And this in an ambient air temperature in excess of 35 degrees centigrade with the humidty nearing 100% – is this your idea of fun?

I was getting a little miffed, especially as I slipped onto my backside in the mud a couple of times, but…

All of a sudden I caught up with the two ‘bush rats’ and my protestations about the ‘jungle scramble’ were immediately hushed into silence as they urgently whispered “Quiet!” to me.

We’d reached the edge of the falls and the road ahead was blocked by a security guard.

So, there we were skulking about in the bushes like thieves in the night trying to find a way in to the falls…

Find out whether we managed to get past the secutity guard or whether we were arrested, look out for part 2 later.

All the best,

Stuart.

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